Engagement Rings > Proposal Ideas & Advice > Frequently Asked Proposal Questions
Frequently Asked Proposal Questions
The thought of getting engaged stirs up lots of emotions. From the time you decide that "she's the one" to the moment you pop the question and put the diamond ring on her finger, you may experience sleepless nights, visit several websites looking for advice, and meet with your friends for drinks, more drinks, even more drinks, and moral support.
Now let's start alleviating your fears with some reliable answers to the most frequently asked proposal and engagement ring questions. If you want proposal suggestions/advice and can't find the answers here, contact us at Proposal Support.
Frequently Asked Proposal Questions
- What should I do to prepare for the proposal, and how should I propose?
- What are the biggest proposal mistakes?
- How do I know what type of engagement ring to buy her?
- What kind of diamond should I buy?
- How much should I spend?
- Where should I buy the engagement ring?
What should I do to prepare for the proposal, and how should I propose?
Remember this moment is about her and not about you.
Create the Proposal of her Dreams.
You can propose just about anywhere, but this is your moment to show her how much you love her, how well you understand her, and how you'll go out of your way to make her happy. Make sure wherever you choose to propose is a place that has meaning for you both and is a place she'll find appealing. It could be a place that holds special memories - the halls of your high school, a cherished restaurant, the back seat of your Toyota, or where you said you loved each other the first time. It could also be a place you've both always wanted to be - from Paris to a radio talk show. Somewhere simple, romantic, and neutral works well too, like a beach or a park.
Remember to make it personal and something she'll love. Check out 47 Perfect Ways to Propose for ideas - each one is guaranteed to have gotten someone to the altar! But first, more tips on how you can plan a proposal that will make her toes curl with delight.
Think of some dates that are meaningful to her.
The anniversary of your first date is a great place to start. If she loves the big holidays, consider proposing on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning, on New Year's Eve or even on Valentine's Day. And select a day that is stress-free, perhaps a weekend day or a vacation day. The first anniversary of her cat's death isn't a good one.
Consider the Type of Woman she is.
If she cries at sappy movies, she is most likely a hopeless romantic. And, if she is, your proposal should take this into account even if your brain cringes at the thought. If she prefers intimacy, think one-on-one, and this doesn't include two seats together at the ballgame as seen on the Jumbotron. But if she adores the spotlight, you may want to try the stadium. If she really enjoys the spotlight, think even bigger. Propose in the stadium...naked. You're sure to make the evening news. Then again, if she doesn't like sports, maybe not. For the woman who likes bold statements, go bold. Hot air balloons, on an African safari, an ad on TV. For the traditional woman, your proposal should be too. Use what you know about her and your proposal will truly win her heart.
Stay Focused
Don't make your plan too complicated.
While creativity is a plus, stay focused on what's really important - the proposal itself. If you're consumed with worry about whether or not the sailboat will get to the luau in time, you're thinking too hard about the wrong thing.
And remember, your proposal can never be too romantic. Your friends will only make fun of you until it's their turn.
Be In the Moment and Speak from the Heart.
What you say is the most important part of the proposal. And to get this right, you need to speak from the heart, expressing yourself with love, honesty and sincerity. And if you know your heart tends to stutter, get shy or put its foot in its mouth, plan what you say in advance. You can never be too romantic, corny or cheesy. Start off by letting her know how much she means to you. Express your love and your wishful desire to spend the rest of your life with her. And once you get to the "Will you marry me?" part, it's her turn to speak. As far as actions go, look into her eyes, take her hand, get down on one knee unless, of course, you're on a roller coaster or skydiving.
Don't be afraid to ask for help.
Our team of experts at Robbins Bros. can brainstorm with you and arrange the necessary details of almost any proposal plan, through Perfect Proposals™ our complimentary and confidential service. We've facilitated proposals everywhere from a historic mansion to some very romantic vineyards to Broadway. And don't worry...everything will be kept confidential, so she won't ever, ever, ever have to know that you didn't think up and plan the whole glorious proposal yourself!
What are the biggest proposal mistakes (and how do I avoid them)?
Don't propose after a long day at work - you'll both be tired and you may not be up for the emotions you'll both experience leading up-to and after the proposal.
Don't propose after you've had an argument, even if you're sitting at the restaurant waiting for the dessert with the ring hidden inside. You don't want anything to spoil this once-in-a-lifetime event! If you did get in a fight, save the proposal for another time (and another dessert).
Make sure you don't propose anyplace that reminds her of an ex-boyfriend/dead relative/episode of food poisoning.
If she is a private person and prefers one-on-one experiences, do not propose using the Jumbotron during a sporting event.
Ask her parents for permission before you propose if she and/or her family is big on tradition. (This is a lovely gesture anyhow, so you should ask her parents if for no other reason than to make a good impression with your future in-laws.)
How do I know what type of engagement ring to buy her?
It's up to you to choose the ring for her that she would have picked out for herself. And, hopefully your future fiancé has been hinting about what she'd like so you have a good start. Perhaps, you've strolled by a jewelry store window and she's commented on the merchandise as in, "I'd love an emerald cut stone like that one in the platinum setting with the side emerald baguettes." Or she's been leaving magazine pages around the house.
If she hasn't said or hinted anything, all hope isn't lost. Consider the jewelry she usually wears. Getting to know what she feels comfortable with on a daily basis will help to narrow down the engagement ring options. Though, always remember, without a doubt, you can involve her in the decision. It's OK to ask her what she likes or go exploratory ring shopping ahead of time.
Metal Color
White gold, silver, yellow gold? If she prefers white metals, then select an engagement ring style in platinum, white gold, or palladium.
If she prefers traditional gold, choose a yellow gold engagement ring, or perhaps a two-tone engagement ring that she can wear with anything.
Style of jewelry/diamonds
Is her current jewelry ornate or simple? (big hoop earrings with lots of beads or plain stud earrings?)
Is her style contemporary-looking, vintage, bold (she wears several big rings on each hand) or classic, resembling those timeless pieces that never go out of style?
Does she have any diamond jewelry? If so, note the shape(s) of the diamonds: round, princess cut (square) and marquise (elongated shape with tapered points on each end) are just a few of the many shapes of diamonds.
Think about her hands
Elongated diamond shapes, such as the marquise or oval, tend to make short fingers look more sleek. The trick is, though, not to overdo the look or it might accomplish just the opposite.
When you put a wide band on a finger, it usually makes it appear shorter, so think proportional. Women with long fingers can easily wear the larger and more bold ring styles. Settings that are small and delicate may get lost on long fingers or large hands, which, due to their size, will make the ring look smaller.
Consider her personality and lifestyle.
If she is conservative and wears a suit everyday, a traditional engagement ring with a center diamond and a few side diamonds should be considered.
If she is a freer spirit and tends to favor things that are funky, a contemporary engagement ring, such as a "floating diamond" style, may be perfect.
Or, if Louis Vuitton and Prada are staples in her closet, check out designer engagement ring collections by Tacori, Jeff Cooper, Scott Kay or Ritani.
If you aren't quite sure what she'd like, but want to surprise her with a diamond engagement ring, the simple yet elegant single diamond, called a solitaire, will be cherished forever. (And, she can always have the diamond reset in a style of her choosing at a later date.)
Go directly to the source
You should know your soon to be fiancé's favorite ice cream, book and body part. You should also be somewhat aware if she'd appreciate having a say in choosing her ring. Online or in-store, she can create a Wish list of her own favorite Robbins Bros. rings. This way you'll know what she wants without Sherlock Holmes skill. It only takes a few minutes and her list can be updated anytime.
Still unsure?
For help more reliable than your uncle's friend's second cousin with a jewelry "business", visit one of our Robbins Bros. stores and ask our experts for help. Our free advice is cheaper than a cubic zirconium.
What kind of diamond should I buy?
This is one of the most important areas when it comes to proposing. After all, when was the last time you went out and bought a diamond? You may have heard about the "4 Cs" or you know that De Beers has something to do with diamonds, based on the romantic commercials you've seen over the years. But how are you, as a consumer, supposed to understand what you are getting? Here is a quick diamond overview:
In order to get a beautiful, brilliant diamond at a price you can afford, look at these four characteristics (also known as the "4 Cs")
Carat Weight - One carat is divided into 100 points. A 50 point diamond would be a half carat. Although size is an important factor in determining the value of a diamond, cut, color, and clarity are equally important. (Note: you'll also hear this word when looking at gold, but "karat" is spelled with a "k", as in 18 karat gold. Karat refers to the purity of gold.)
Cut - This refers to the facets, specifically the placement, number, shape and craftsmanship. Look for a diamond that is properly cut. If a diamond is shallow or cut too deep, the beauty and brilliance will be affected. It is how the facets, the tiny planes cut on the diamond's surface, are angled and sized that determine how light reflects and exits the diamond, an effect known as its "fire". Robbins Bros. offers unique cuts that allow you to maximize the diamond's brilliance on any budget.
Color - The color of a diamond can range from Colorless to a Light Yellow, and even to shades of blue, red, amber, pink and canary yellow. Ranges are categorized as shown below.
Clarity - Clarity refers to the diamond's tiny markings - if they can only be seen under 10 power magnification, they will not dramatically affect the beauty and brilliance. (Think of this as the diamond's birthmark - a unique feature that makes the diamond one-of-a-kind.) However, they will dramatically affect the price. You may hear the terms "clear" or "clean" when looking at diamonds.
Keep in mind, it never hurts to ask. In fact, it's better to ask. You'll be guaranteed a high end product only if you work with reliable professionals who know their diamonds from glass - and who'd never sell you glass.
Robbins Bros., World's Biggest Engagement Ring Store also offers these Six Cardinal Rules to consider when buying your diamond:
Diamond Certification
Most diamonds at Robbins Bros. are certified by one of the following independent laboratories:
How much should I spend?
This is the fifth C - Cost. And what you spend is a matter as personal as boxers or briefs. You will probably hear that two months' salary is the "rule". But that isn't possible for many people and, frankly, isn't necessary to get a gorgeous engagement ring that will make her heart turn cartwheels of joy. Remember: the engagement ring is a symbol of your love for her. And, whether that is a simple ring that costs $100 or a five carat diamond set in platinum that sets you back $60,000, the meaning is the same, you love her and want to be the ball on her chain forever. Spend the amount that YOU are comfortable with on a ring that will withstand daily wear for 30, 40, or 50+ years and her mother's scrutinizing gaze.
Here's some simple logic to help you out: Unlike clothing, a plasma TV, or even a car, the engagement ring will be worn 365 days a year until death-do-you-part. That is a long time! You may have heard about dollar-cost averaging when investing in your retirement plan. Well, you could also approach the ring purchase the same way.
Engagement Ring Cost: $4200
Number of Years Ring is Worn on Left Hand: 50 years
Annualized Ring Cost: $84
Daily Cost: 23 cents
Now, think about this: your car payment is $350 per month (or $4200 per year). You might keep that car four, five, maybe six years, and then trade it in or sell it. 50 years from now you probably won't remember much, if anything about that car you spent over $20,000 on back when you were young.
Bottom line, the amount you should spend on the engagement ring is up to you. And you also want your soon to be fiancé to love it, show it off to her friends and colleagues, make the girlfriends and wives of your friends jealous, and possibly even pass it down as an heirloom for future generations - and those future generations aren't so far off in the coming now.
It is imperative to consider spending the greatest percentage of your budget on the part of the ring that will give you the most satisfaction. A smaller diamond that is flawless will cost the same as a larger diamond with inclusions, so you'll need to decide if you'd be happiest with a larger carat weight even if you may see a few tiny flaws (inclusions), or a smaller diamond that is close to perfect.
Where should I go to buy the engagement ring?
No ifs, ands, or buts, go to a place you can trust. Ask your friends, co-workers and family members for a reputable engagement ring and diamond specialist. If you are new to the area, or you're the first in your group to get engaged, check for industry organization affiliation. If the store is a member of the Gemological Institute of America (GIA), or is accredited by the Jewelers of America, you'll likely be in good hands.
This is a big purchase, so it's important to understand exactly what you are getting. A reputable store will offer to educate you on everything from the diamonds, to the metal, to the care of the ring. Ideally, you want to know as much as the experts, so go to an expert. The store should have a long history of selling engagement rings, and have on-site master jewelers who are experienced with engagement rings and working with platinum, white gold, yellow gold, palladium and titanium. Be sure to print out a copy of the Six Cardinal Rules and refer to this when shopping at jewelry stores.
Up to now, we've been completely neutral in all that we've said, but we can't resist saying it here... Robbins Bros. is a reliable source for engagement rings. We have one of the world's largest selections, a reputation to uphold, and, for your benefit, consultation is free.
